Welcome to EBible Fellowship’s Bible study in the Book of Genesis. This is study #22 of Genesis, chapter 3 and we are continuing to look at Genesis 3:16:

Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

In the first instance, God is laying down the Law for the household and the household (through the marriage relationship) has been the building block of every society in the nations of the world, so this is an extremely important principal that God has established for the home.

When a man and a woman come together and God joins them together in marriage, they become one flesh and, yet, there will necessarily be decisions that have to be made. If it is not established right from the start who has the final say (the husband or the wife), it is not a good thing and it will lead to confusion and arguments. When both think they have equal authority in decision making, they will just butt heads in the relationship and God has wisely determined that in the household the wife will submit to the husband. In so doing, we know that God has established the spiritual picture of the bride of Christ (the elect) submitting to the Lord Jesus Christ, her Husband. We have seen that spiritual picture between Adam and Eve since their creation and, so, too, in this verse the wife’s desire is to her husband. Spiritually, this means that she will have an ongoing desire to do the will of God. True believers will have a desire to do God’s commandments.

It says in the last part of Genesis 3:16:

… and he shall rule over thee.

The word translated as “rule” is Strong’s #4910 and it is a word that is used in connection with a king or a governor. For instance, it says in 1Kings 4:21:

And Solomon reigned over all kingdoms from the river unto the land of the Philistines, and unto the border of Egypt…

The word “reigned” is the same Hebrew word that is translated as “rule,” as our verse said of the husband of Eve, “and he shall rule over thee.”

We are not going to turn there, but in Genesis 45, verse 3 it speaks of Joseph as the “governor” of Egypt and that meant that he possessed the authority. He could command people to do things and they were under authority to him because Pharaoh had given him that authority and they were obligated to obey him.

It says in Zechariah 6:12-13:

And speak unto him, saying, Thus speaketh JEHOVAH of hosts, saying, Behold the man whose name is The BRANCH; and he shall grow up out of his place, and he shall build the temple of JEHOVAH: Even he shall build the temple of the LORD; and he shall bear the glory, and shall sit and rule upon his throne; and he shall be a priest upon his throne: and the counsel of peace shall be between them both.

The Branch is a reference to the Lord Jesus and He will sit upon his throne and “rule” or “reign.” It is to have the power of a king.

In looking up this word, we can see why some people have said of our verse in Genesis that “a man’s house is his castle,” and I know that today that is not a very welcome expression for women to hear because it is the age of liberation and everyone is equal. Well, we are all equally sinners in God’s sight and if we are one of the elect, we equally find grace in God’s sight whether we are men and women. As far as work is concerned, there should be equal pay if a man and woman do the same job, but that is not the point. In certain areas God has established structure and one of those areas is the home. In the home, the husband is the head and he has the final say.

However, God also speaks to the husband and commands him to love his wife. You can have a good ruler or an evil ruler, as the history of Israel and Judah proves or the history of the world proves. You can have a benevolent king or a wicked king. A benevolent king has the authority and exercises that authority in a God-glorifying way. You can find that to be the case with certain kings, governors, senators or in the churches in regard to the elders and deacons. You can find that to be true with the husband in the home. They have been given authority by God over the home and they are to exercise that authority in a God-glorifying way. They are not to rule as an evil king and they are not to beat down those over whom they have authority. They are to rule according to the commandments of God.

In the case of the husband, he is commanded to love his wife and that would mean he will take into consideration what his wife has to say and he will listen to her before making the final decision. He will not just issue a decree, “Woman, this is what we are doing and I do not want to hear any more.” That would not be exercising his God-given authority in the proper way. Sometimes he will listen to his wife and find her to be right and he will do as the wife preferred, and so forth. At other times, he will make the determination and he will say, “No. I am sorry. I understand that you want to do that, but we are not going to do it that way.” At that point, the wife is to leave it alone, as long as what the husband has said is lawful. What I mean by that is that the wife is to submit to her husband in all things lawful. A lawful thing is that which is in accord with the Law of God and the husband is not telling her to do something contrary to the Law of God. If it is a matter of what they are going to buy, like a car or a house, then the wife is not going to get upset and cause trouble in the home; maybe she is not going to cook dinner and she is trying to get her way by doing (or not doing) certain things in order to undermine the authority of her husband. That should not be. The wife should say, “You have the final authority. I explained to you the best I could why I wanted this, but in this case it is a lawful thing and we will do it your way.” She would submit to him and that is what God would have a wife to do.

This same word translated as “rule” is found in Psalm 59:13:

Consume them in wrath, consume them, that they may not be: and let them know that God ruleth in Jacob unto the ends of the earth. Selah.

God ruling in Jacob is saying the same thing spiritually as the husband ruling over his wife. God rules in Jacob, the elect, and Christ rules over His bride. To illustrate this wonderful truth, God has laid down authority within the home. It is not just in the home, but the home is a place that God has especially emphasized to reflect the spiritual truth of the relationship between Christ and all those He has saved. We know it says in Ephesians 5:22-24:

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

Does it say to submit in practically everything or in most things? No – it says that the wives are to be in subjection to their husbands in everything, so there is not an area in which it is left to the woman to be the authority in some area. Now the husband can say to his wife, “When it comes to taking care of the house or when it comes to shopping, you are in charge. That is your area and you take care of the shopping and the money for that.” But the woman is not to say, “This is my area and I will rule in this area.” She is to be subject to her husband as the church is subject to Christ. She is to be subject to her own husband in everything and in all areas of the marriage. There are no exceptions to this. There is a parallel Scripture in Colossians 3:18-19:

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

The latter command to the husband is a whole other subject matter, but that is not the focus of our study. Our focus is as directed by our verse in Genesis in regard to husbands ruling over their wives in the home. We looked at this a few studies ago, but it says in 1Peter 3:1-5:

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:

Again, it says the wives are to be in subjection to their husbands. This was the Law of God from the beginning, as we are reading in Genesis when God established the marriage relationship. He established the authority structure in the homes and the husbands rule over the wives. Here, in 1Peter, the Lord is speaking of the holy women of old that trusted in God and were in subjection to their own husbands. Then He gives an example in 1Peter 3:6:

Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

So we have gone from the time of creation all the way to the time of Abraham who was born in 2167BC. That is about 9,000 years from creation. Sara was in submission, “calling him lord.” That is just an example that shows the relationship that she had with her husband; she looked to her husband as the head and he had the rule in the home. There was a time when Sara wanted Abraham to go in unto Hagar, but later Sara wanted to cast out the bond woman and her child. It grieved Abraham that Sara wanted to do this, but the Lord told him to listen to her. In this case the wife was pressing upon the husband to get rid of this woman and her child and Abraham could easily have said to her, “Look, you are the one that wanted me to go in unto her. It is all a result of what you did.” Fingers could have been pointed, but God intervened. It is extremely important in every Christian house that they look to God for wisdom, insight and guidance and for Him to direct them. Really it is not what the husband wants or what the wife wants, but both of them should be looking to God in regard to His will. In this case, it was God’s will that Abraham listen to his wife and send away the bond woman and her son, so Abraham exercised proper authority. He did what his wife wanted, but he did so at the leading of God.

This is the meaning we find in Ecclesiastes 4:12:

And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

We know that in marriage the two become one flesh, but it is also absolutely necessary for a marriage to endure, especially today in this evil world with all the wickedness. The marriage institution is under assault. It is necessary for there to be a third partner in marriage: the husband, the wife and God. God’s Spirit must be in the marriage as they both look together toward God. If there is a believing couple, they really should pray together every day to the Lord for help, strength and wisdom. The husband should pray, “O, Father, help me to love my wife. Help me to lead and to rule in the household in a good way and in a proper way and not in a way where I am abusing my authority.” The wife ought to be praying that she would have the humility to submit to her husband.

In a marriage and in the family unit God stresses that there must be humility in the family. Humility is the ingredient that will make it a happy home and a peaceful house. When there is a home that is doing things God’s way there has to be submission in all relationships. The parents exercise rule over their children and the children are to submit to their parents. When the Lord Jesus was 12 years old, his parents did not know where he was for three days and they found him in the temple and He asked them, “Wist ye not that I must be about my Father's business?” Then it says in Luke 2:51:

And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them: but his mother kept all these sayings in her heart.

The word “subject” is a word that means to “submit.” Jesus Christ, who is God in the flesh, had all power and might and He spoke and created the whole earth and the sun, moon and starts. He is the God of all things. He was Almighty God, the possessor of heaven and earth, with supreme authority over everything and, yet, notice the humility He demonstrated. He was born of the Virgin Mary and while He was a child this reveals what would have been happening in their household – Jesus was subject unto them. When His mother told Him to do something, He would have done it in all things lawful. When His stepfather told Him to do something, He would have done it in all things lawful. He was honoring His parents by submitting to them and humbling Himself to them.

This is how God has not only set up the home in the relationship between parents and children and between husband and wife, but God has really established rule in all areas of life. It says in 1Peter 2:13-15:

Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake: whether it be to the king, as supreme; Or unto governors, as unto them that are sent by him for the punishment of evildoers, and for the praise of them that do well. For so is the will of God, that with well doing ye may put to silence the ignorance of foolish men:

Notice that statement in 1Peter 2:13: “Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man.” Does it say, “Submit yourself to every ordinance of man with which you agree?” No – it does not say that. And it also does not say, “Submit yourself to every ordinance of God.” It does not say that either. It is not the ordinance of God, but the ordinance of man. What is the ordinance of man? It is the local law, the state law and the federal law. For example, it may be a law that says that you have to go 25 mph in a certain zone or 55mph on the highway or it is a law that says to “yield” or to “stop” at a stop sign. It may be a law that says you have to pay a certain tax. It may be a law that says you must declare everything on your taxes. There is law, after law, after law and these are “ordinances of men.”

I do not know if true believers get caught up with this, but since so many people are critical of the government and critical of laws, it might be easy to fall into trying to go around the law and to not obey the law. People might say, “This is a minor law,” or they might say, “Everybody does it, so I am not going to pay any attention to that law.” Yet, the Bible says, “Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake.” It does not mean to submit to most of the ordinances, but all of them, with this one exception – it must be lawful according to the Law of God. There is a greater Law and a Supreme Law and that is the Law of God in the Bible. As long as the government is commanding us to do something that is in accord with the greater Law of God, we are to obey.